YO MAMMA SO FAT

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前两天的系列贴发完,竟有不明真相的新粉询问「莫非你就是传说中的英语大师?」我回复道「呸!有话说话你干嘛骂人!那是吐槽啊!吐槽啊!你真的看不出那几Part是吐槽贴吗?真的没明白帖子前言的意思吗?真的没看出微博置顶里哪个词才是重点吗?真的没有读懂自动回复里那一长串自封头衔吗?真的不知道我有特别滴技巧的是哪个方面吗?真的没查过我账号名中的sensual是啥意思吗?真的是来寻觅高雅艺术欣赏严肃文学的吗?」两分钟后对方回复「吐槽是啥意思啊?」于是我含着半口未吐尽的老血默默下线反思人生_(:з」∠)_

反思的结果是,三俗普及事业正处于并将长期处于大众传播的初级阶段。唯有加大宣传推广力度,提升节操粉碎强度,才能让Sansutology在更广阔的天地中生根发芽。

于是乎,今日特地选取了一组三俗至极!没品至极!政治绝对不正确!的「你妈太肥」笑话合集献给大家。看过之后,您绝对也能拥有令人俯视的下限。

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英文段子有很多固定的传统梗,如小鸡过马路啊,几个人拧灯泡啊,谁和谁上酒吧啊。其中最碎节操的没品梗之一,就是「你妈太肥」(Yo mamma so fat)。

警告:如果你不喜欢三俗,不爱看没品段子,不接受政治不正确的美式笑话的话哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈那你也不会关注我不是!所以请勇敢地抛开矜持往下看吧~

1.Yo mama so fat, when she walked by TV, I missed 3 episodes!

你妈太肥,当她从电视前走过时,我错过了三集电视剧!

2.Yo mamma so fat I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing

你妈太肥,我圣诞节给她照了张相,结果到现在还没打印完呢。

3.Yo momma so fat, that when she steps on a scale it says to be continued.

你妈太肥,当她站上体重秤时,上面显示「未完待续」。

4.Yo mamma so fat that when God said “Let there be Light”, he told her to move her fat ass out of the way.

你妈太肥,当上帝说「要有光」时,得先命令她把肥屁股挪开。

5.Yo mamma so fat, every time she wears high heels, she strikes oil.

你妈太肥,她每次穿高跟鞋时都能踩出石油。

6.Yo mamma so fat, when I tried to drive around her, I ran out of gas.

你妈太肥,我试图开车围着她转一圈,结果车都跑没油了。

7.Yo mamma so fat, her ass has it’s own zip code.

你妈太肥,连她的屁股都有自己的邮编。

8.Yo mamma so fat, she wears a watch on each arm, one for each time zone.

你妈太肥,她两手各戴一块表,显示的是不同时区。

9.Yo mamma so fat her beeper went off and people thought she was backing up.

你妈太肥,当她BP机响起时,人们还以为是在倒车呢。

10.Yo mamma so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don’t get wet.

你妈太肥,她洗澡时脚都湿不着。

11.Yo mama’s so fat, she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu, and says “Okay.”

你妈太肥,她去餐馆吃饭,看完菜单之后说「行啊就这些吧」。

12.Yo mama’s so fat Mount Everest tried to climb her.

你妈太肥,珠穆朗玛峰想攀登她。

13.Yo mama’s so fat she wore a yellow raincoat and people yelled Taxi!

你妈太肥,当她穿上黄色雨衣时,人们大喊「出租车!」

14.Yo mama’s so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

你妈太肥,她涂唇彩时得用油漆滚筒。

15.Yo mama’s so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

你妈太肥,你得在门框上抹油,再在门的另一头拿着蛋糕,才能让她出来。

16.Yo mama’s so fat, even her shadow has stretch marks.

你妈太肥,连她的影子都有妊娠纹。

17.Yo mama’s so fat, she can lay down and stand up and her height doesn’t change.

你妈太肥,她站着躺着一样高。

18.Yo mama’s so fat, she stood in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said H d.

你妈太肥,当她站在好莱坞(Hollywood)标志前时,标牌只剩下H和D了。

19.Yo mama’s so fat, she fell in the Grand Canyon and got stuck.

你妈太肥,她从大峡谷掉下去,结果卡住了。

20.Yo mama’s so fat, she was born with a silver shovel in her mouth.

你妈太肥,她是含着银铁锹出生的。

21.Yo mama is so fat, the horse on her Polo shirt is real.

你妈太肥,她Polo衫上的马是真的。

22.Yo mama is so fat, when the cashier at KFC asked what size bucket she wanted, she said the one on the roof.

你妈太肥,当KFC收银员问她要多大桶时,她说就要你家屋顶那型号的。

23.Yo mama is so fat when she goes swimming the whales start singing We are Family.

你妈太肥,她去游泳时,鲸鱼们高唱「我们是一家人」

24.Yo mama is so fat, she measures 36 24 36, and the other arm is just as big.

你妈太肥,她的三围是36 24 36,而另一只胳膊也是如此。

25.Yo mama is so fat, at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts.

你妈太肥,她去动物园,结果大象给她扔花生。

26.Yo mama is so fat, her driver’s license says “Picture continued on other side.”

你妈太肥,她驾照上写着「照片未完,另一面继续」

27.Yo mama is so fat, her college graduation picture was an aerial.

你妈太肥,她大学毕业照是航拍的。

28.Yo mama is so fat, she has to get out of the car to change the radio station.

你妈太肥,她得先下车,然后才能调电台。

29.Yo mama is so fat, I gain weight just by watching her eat.

你妈太肥,光是看她吃饭我就长肉了。

30.Yo mama is so fat, she plays hopscotch like this: LA, Detroit, Seattle, NY.

你妈太肥,她玩跳房子时,格子里面是:洛杉矶,底特律,西雅图,纽约。

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